Postal III is a game for twats about a twat. I couldn’t give a fuck about it, or its fans. No strong moral objection or anything, it’s just the only people I know who like the Postal series of games are actual proper tossers. Or children. Either way, they’re fucking dirty fruit dodgers.
Anyway, what’s all this about SCRUMPING?!
As this video shows, apparently you can scrump apples.
For those unaware of the practice of scrumping, it means stealing apples. (aka OGGY RAIDING)
Shame that you’d have to buy Postal III to get some virtual scrumping in. Still, fruits is fruits, and as such we gots to cover it in Fruitaku.
An alert (and probably involved in the development) Fruitaku reader pointed us recently to the direction of ‘Fall’ – a simplistic one button game from One Switch Gaming.
|Fall – a Screenshot. Contains FRUT.
WAIT? WHAT? YES! It’s everyone’s favourite time: BULLET POINT REVIEW TIME.
- YES! Contains FRUT. Good fruit too, nicely rendered in few pixels. Fine selection of the essentials too. There’s all the crowd pleasers such as cherrys, bananas and PULMZ… none of the tat like SWEETS or you know, that sort of trot.
- ONE BUTTON! You can play it with one finger, toe, other implement. We’re super duper all for games with simplistic controls here at Fruitaku; especially games which can even be played by people who have something better to do with their other hand, or those who don’t have hands that work so good.
- MAN WITH BIG NOSE! Yes! The dude in it has a big nose
- IT’S NOT SHIT! We at Fruitaku enjoyed playing this game.
- TOP OFFICE GAMING ACTION! It’s short and fun and straight in to the action. None of this tutorial muck.
If this game were a fruit, it would be a banana with no black bits on.
Inclusive gaming + fruit = FRUITAKU APPROVES